Hoeface and I flew to NYC a few weeks ago to hang out with Slutbag, who lives one block from Central Park.
I'm going to hit the highlights of the trip here.
A. We walked around a lot.
Then let's say the first night you stayed at Slutbag's, in which you were shocked at how quiet the neighborhood was, it being right next to the park and all, takes a turn for the worse at about 9 am this particular morning. Let's say you had been sleeping for, oh, about 3 hours, when you hear jackhammering. Incessant jackhammering. Right outside the apartment, 4 floors down. And you're all, WTF? And this is how you feel...
And you just want to keep doing this...
And at another store, Slutbag found this one for me. I'm not sure I ever would have tried it on. But it's amazing.
I don't even know where that picture above was taken. We walked around the Upper West Side, a few of the Villages, past Wall Street, near the foot of the Brooklyn Bridge, the Flatiron (that's a place I think), and of course Central Park. I couldn't get enough of Central Park, although I think this shows how poorly I would do actually living in New York.
B. We ate some food. We got pizza, Italian, local and precious, more pizza, lobster rolls, and Caribbean/soul food (delivered!). I wish I could remember the pizza place we ate at - I loved it. And the Italian place was so amazing. The owner is Italian and goes back to Italy all the time, and he and all the staff are super friendly. Also the food is amazing.
C. We put dresses on and went out. Hoeface (who lives in Idaho) and I don't get too many opportunities to wear dresses. I mean I do it here in Seattle, but I always feel a little overdressed. Anyway, we went out Friday 'til 3 am, and Saturday 'til 5 am. Why, you ask? Well, I'm not entirely sure except to say that bars don't close in NYC until 3 or 4. And then Hoeface may get you invited to the after party at a bar that has closed for the evening except for restaurant-industry people. Then she may proceed to nearly get you kicked out of the place. Then you might find yourself sweet/naive-talking the bartender into letting you all stay. Then you may all take shots that you may or may not remember, and you certainly didn't need, with a random Czech dude. Then you might possibly have them unlock the door to let you all go home at 5 am, instead of the initially agreed upon time of 6 am (as in, no one can leave until 6 am).
Then let's say the first night you stayed at Slutbag's, in which you were shocked at how quiet the neighborhood was, it being right next to the park and all, takes a turn for the worse at about 9 am this particular morning. Let's say you had been sleeping for, oh, about 3 hours, when you hear jackhammering. Incessant jackhammering. Right outside the apartment, 4 floors down. And you're all, WTF? And this is how you feel...
And you just want to keep doing this...
And you finally make it outside (not for your perfectly planned brunch plans on Mother's Day morning, wearing Slutbag's borrowed Kentucky Derby hats, on 3 hours sleep and mightily hungover, obviously), but outside, at some point, nonetheless. And the sidewalk right outside Slutbag's apartment looks like this...
So what are we on now? D? Yes, I think so...
D. Shopping. I arrived with my large checked bag only half full. I was prepared. For one, it's New York, let's do this. For two, Hoeface and Slutbag are my favorite shopping buddies. Slutbag knows exactly what will work for me, and Hoeface knows when something is a good deal or isn't (as in, "When I'm in China I can get that exact same bag for $30." You don't want to buy it after that comment).
Also I needed a wristlet. I mean I don't even own a clutch, and when you're out a clutch with a wrist strap is what you need. I always viewed these as a little too girly for me, but if Hoeface can do it, so can I. So I bought this. And I love it. LOVE IT! White leather, need I say more?
And then I've been on a dress kick lately. We may or may not have walked out of Brooklyn Industries all in a different version of a chambray dress. I got this one (it looks better on me. What is with this model???).
And at another store, Slutbag found this one for me. I'm not sure I ever would have tried it on. But it's amazing.
Front.
Back.
Then we played around in Sephora where I found my favorite lipstick of all time. Yves Saint Laurent Le Fuchsia. Don't even think about telling me $30 is too much for lipstick. This is not lipstick. This is happiness in a tube. It smells nice, it's creamy and smooth, but it also stays on. What? Yes, that's possible apparently. And the colors? The colors are amazing. Try a color on at Sephora, and you'll see that it either WORKS for you, it. does. not. None of that in-between of other lipstick, where you'll all, "well this looks ok, but I'm not sure." Le Fuchsia is exactly what I wanted, a HOT PINK fuchsia that is bright and bold, but oddly also just looks amazing on. It doesn't take over your face like you would expect it to, it makes your face look better. Is $30 asking too much for that? No.
And then the gloss. Oh dear, this is going to be another love letter to YSL makeup, get ready. I LOVE YSL gloss. Ever since Hoebag was gifted some from a long-ago boy-toy, I've been in love with it. It smells like yummy peaches (update: apparently it's mango), it's glossy and rich, there are seriously gold flecks in there, and the colors? Yes, they're amazing. Bold and super flattering. This color is Insolence, and not only is it perfect for me, it looks incredible on top of Le Fuchsia. Watch out, world.I also have Golden Pink that Hoeface gave me (she regifts!), and I love it. Here's the other thing... the packaging is so beautiful that just seeing them on my dresser makes me feel like I'm winning at life. It's shiny! And gold! And shiny!
In short, YSL lipsticks and glosses are exactly what you're hoping for every time you buy that tube at the drugstore, and then instantly become disappointed with. Glamour in a bottle, for reals.
Which leads me to...
E. I could not live in New York. There are really only 2 things to do there. Work and spend money. I don't care how you do it: dine, drink, get entertained, or shop. The perks of the city require money. If I lived there I would HAVE to make a lot of money, or marry someone who made a lot of money (have I mentioned what an amazing lady of leisure I would make?). There are just so many beautiful things in the city - amazing food, amazing shows, amazing clothes, amazing bags, amazing luxury goods, amazing apartments - but this stuff costs serious money. I would not be too happy walking by all this everyday and depriving myself of it.
The places I've chosen (and will chose to) live are different. There are plenty of perks that don't require a lot of money - the places are more egalitarian that way. Like here, a lot of the beauty of the city lies in the outdoor activities - you can kayak, surf, paddleboard, run, garden, have a large enough kitchen to cook or bake, right in the city. A short drive away and you can snowboard, hang out in islands, hike in woods or mountains, tour a brewery or winery, or camp. The beautiful things in life that also don't take a whole lot of money. Life is simpler.
But in New York, I totally get how you would just work to consume. So, I think I will keep it as a place I love to visit, and I will never fly in with my suitcase more than half full, and will always fly back feeling a little more fabulous.
2 comments:
You left out something major here: where did the blue and black lace dress come from?
Also, we should go shopping together. I LOVE shopping. It is my dirty little secret. My closet overflowing with pricey never-worn cocktail dresses. I know, I am an ecologist. But as a southern Californian, it is really my cultural heritage to love buying shit.
T-Rex - Dress came from Yamak - a fantastic little boutique in the village (http://yamakny.com/) and confirmed that it looks AMAZING on her. The pizza place was JOHN'S!! iconic! and constantly in the pizza battle with Grimaldi's over whose slice is best... could have tasted Grimaldi's too to confirm for ourselves, but the 2 non-new yorkers were not up for walking across the bridge ;)
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